Indie Publishing

Deep POV Tips Part 4: Of Sneaks and Shallow POV

Editing for Deep POV

Editing for Deep POV

Last month I attended a webinar the subject of which was deep third person POV and I then started this series. Part 1 (including links to other deep POV resources),   Part 2 & Part 3 of this series are available if you want to catch-up on the topic. As promised, here are more tips gleaned from the presentation that you may find helpful as I know they will be for me.

Sam: What are you up to? Sneaking off, are we?
Gollum: Sneaking? Sneaking? Fat Hobbit is always so polite. Smeagol shows them secret ways that nobody else could find, and they say “sneak!” Sneak? Very nice friend. Oh, yes, my precious. Very nice, very nice.
Sam: All right, all right! You just startled me is all. What were you doing?
Gollum: Sneaking.
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)

There’s often a sneak creeping through writing that hurts deep POV. It’s pervasive and slowly sucks the life, excitement and tension from a book like Gollum with a filched egg.

Gollum: [singing] The rock and pool, is nice and cool, so juicy sweet. Our only wish,
[he whacks the fish on the rock]
Gollum: to catch a fish,
[another whack]
Gollum: so juicy sweet.
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

Before you know it, the sneak is stealing all the fish in your writing and singing about it while you go blithely along with the story.

Be careful of the sneak! Don’t let him follow you from that log in the river! Beware lest you find your work rife with all kinds of sneaky, thieving, well you know…

So what’s so sneaky in deep POV and how can it be fixed? Prepositions. But not just any old prepositions, just the sneaky ones. Preposition are necessary except for those that express emotion.

Here are some shallow/deep examples our presenter, Delia Latham, used in her presentation, “Demystifying Deep POV”:

Sneaks in Writing

Sneaky Prepostion Examples

See the sneaks and how they work little bits of mischief in the narrative? Yet in the deeper examples there’s more lively, creative expression.

Have you got sneaks in your writing? Share how you root them out in by leaving a comment.

Please see my Contact page for ways to connect with me and view my News page for information on my current fundraising campaign for The Bow of Destiny on Indiegogo which ends on 9/5. Also read the companion blog serial for The Bow of Destiny entitled “What is Needed“. New links to reviews for The Black Bag have been post on the Store page so check those out if you are interested in a short fantasy read.

I’m always interested in comments so please feel free to leave them below. Also, remember that followers of this blog via email receive a coupon to download my short ebook, The Black Bag, from Smashwords so sign-up today.

Thanks for reading!

PHS

Tech Tip: 5 Ways To Get More Out of Twitter

Clip Art Image Copyright by Microsoft. Clip Art Used by Permission of Microsoft

Clip Art Image Copyright by Microsoft. Clip Art Used by Permission of Microsoft

Writers, do you need more information out of Twitter? Perhaps you already have HootSuite and schedule tweets as well as view reports about your reach. Maybe you need more information about the performance of your account. Here are three sites that provide information you can use to improve how you tweet. BE AWARE that all these sites show free information but offer more for payment. I’m not instructing you to pay for anything – only providing sites that show basic information at no charge. Just like with Hootsuite or JustUnfollow, if you want more than the basics it costs money.

Twittercounter - This tool helps with long-term analysis of your Twitter account and is especially helpful with marketing. You can see months of information including who has followed you, who you have followed and how many tweets you have sent.

You can also receive their helpful newsletter with tips for Twitter like these:

Tweriod - This is another online analysis tool that provides reports about your Twitter account regarding best times to tweet. If you are promoting something you can find out when your followers are most active and available to interact with your tweets.

adsTwitterads.Twitter – this analytics page allows you to see your engagement in the world of Twitter. Once you click on the link, click the Anylitics drop-down menu and choose “Twitter activity”. This site is where you can sign-up to use ads on Twitter but it has several useful pieces of information with several charts including:

  • Impressions performance over the last 28 days – you can adjust the time to specific months too
  • Engagement rate
  • Link clicks
  • Retweets
  • Favorites
  • Replies

hashtag searchHashtags.org – this site lets you search for hashtags to verify they exist and for what they are used. It has a simple search field at the top of the page and provides information for the hashtag that includes:

  • 24 hour trend graph for the hashtag – this tracks the recent trends
  • Related hashtags
  • Related tweets with the hashtag – this can be useful to determine whether it fits your tweet well

retweet rankRetweetrank.com - need to know how you’re doing with your tweets? Use this site to check how much your tweets have been re-tweeted. This is handy for verifying what your reach is so you can track your reach over time and how effective your promotions and ads are. Just enter your Twitter name to check.

Bonus Material: Read this article from Nicholas Rossis which compares marketing on Facebook and Twitter. This blog post from Marc Guberti gives even more information about using Twitter for marketing. While you’re on Marc’s site you can receive his free book about improving chances of getting more retweets.

Available at Amazon, Smashwords and All Major E-Book Vendors!

Available at Amazon, Smashwords and All Major E-Book Vendors!

Do you need more performance information from your Twitter account? Do you use other tools for gathering analytic information? What other information do you track for your account? I’d love to hear from you so won’t you leave a question, idea or strategy in the comment section? I’d also love to connect with you over social media so check my contact page for that information. See the News page for announcements and remember to sign-up to receive news and posts by email. I’ve added a new sign-up tab on my FaceBook page to simplify the process. New followers can download The Black Bag via free coupon today!

Thanks for reading!

PHS

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Note: no logos have been used – only screenshots for instruction.

Clip art licensed via Microsoft Office

Finding Beta-Readers

UnicornAre beta-readers like unicorns – can’t find any? Perhaps my writing circle at a local level is narrow but folks with both willingness and insight are hard to find in some areas. Here are a few ways to recruit readers.

Not familiar with beta-reading? Simply put, these are people who are willing to read your work and provide feedback – they are testing your story for all the problems it has. They are useful to engage when you are a little further along than just a rough draft but maybe not ready for professional, detailed editing. Beta-readers let you know many things about your work that you miss in some way be it slow action, confusion about details or ideas that improve your concept. These readers are like a focus group and they are even more helpful in genre reading. This article provides sensible questions you can use with your beta-readers which can provide you valuable feedback.

Reading GroupBut how do you find these unicorns? Here are several ways to find them:

  • Querying for them: check out #betareaders on Twitter – just post your needs and genre on Twitter with this hashtag and you will likely receive replies. Regular scans of this hashtag may reveal several possible beta-readers.
  • Hire a unicorn tracker! Just kidding
  • Ask for volunteers from your website
  • Read this post from Belinda Pollard with a variety of suggestions.
  • Also, here’s another article from Writing by the Seat of My Pants with another good list at the end.
Available at Amazon, Smashwords and All Major E-Book Vendors!

Available at Amazon, Smashwords and All Major E-Book Vendors!

Have ever used beta-readers? Do you have suggestions for finding beta-readers? Ever caught a unicorn? I’d love to hear from you so won’t you leave a question, idea or strategy in the comment section? I’d also love to connect with you over social media so check my contact page for that information. See the News page for announcements and remember to sign-up to receive news and posts by email. I’ve added a new sign-up tab on my FaceBook page to simplify the process. New followers can download The Black Bag via free coupon today!

Thanks for reading!

PHS

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Clip art license via Microsoft Office

Cover art for The Black Bag licensed from iStockPhoto.com