Deep POV Tips Pt. 5: Eliminate Narrative Distance

Editing for Deep POV

Editing for Deep POV

This writing tips series began after I attended a webinar in late July the subject of which was deep third person POV . Part 1 , Part 2Part 3 & Part 4 of this series are available if you want to catch-up on the topic. As promised, here are more tips gleaned from the presentation that you may find helpful as I know they will be for me.

One characteristic of deep POV is the elimination of narrative distance. What does this mean? Simply put, the reader lives with the POV character as the events happen instead of being informed or directed by a narrator. In other words, instead of using a narrative voice with tags that cue the reader on activity and dialogue by the main POVC, the deep POV style lets the reader experience the action with the main POVC.  For example:

Narratvie usage: When the door opened, Martha turned with surprise and said, “Who’s there?”

Deep POV: The door banged open. Martha whirled. “Who’s there?”

Notice the difference? There’s not a tag for Martha’s question. Also the action is ongoing in the second example which is accomplished by the verb usage and dropping unnecessary conditions and descriptions. In so doing, the narrative excess is removed along with the telling and passivity.

In my next post, I’ll focus on another characteristic of deep POV and how it is applied.

Want more pointers? Try these resources for deep POV:

Rivet Your Readers with Deep Point of View by Jill Elizabeth Nelson

Writer’s Guide to Emotion: Fiction Writing Tools by Sherry Soule

See also  Why Wheel of Time Will be Better Than Game of Thrones

Check out Janice Hardy’s Fiction University.

Do you use deep POV? Why or why not? How do you utilize these and other aspects of this technique. I love receiving comments so feel free to leave one via the form. Also, you can receive notifications about this blog by email and even receive coupon to download my award-winning short story for free. Sign-up and download today!

Thanks for stopping by and reading.

P. H. Solomon

BOD FinalAbout the Author

P. H. SolIMG_4154-Editomon lives in the greater Birmingham, AL area where he strongly dislikes yard work and sanding the deck rail. However, he performs these duties to maintain a nice home for his loved ones as well as the family’s German Shepherds. In his spare time, P. H. rides herd as a Computer Whisperer on large computers called servers (harmonica not required). Additionally, he enjoys reading, running, most sports and fantasy football. Having a degree in Anthropology, he also has a wide array of more “serious” interests in addition to working regularly to hone his writing. The Bow of Destiny is his first novel-length title with more soon to come.

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  1. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you
    make this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you?
    Plz answer back as I’m looking to design my own blog and would
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    1. This is a free theme from WordPress where I am hosted. I cannot afford a custom theme at this time though I hope to change that in the near future. Check out WordPress for hosting your site if you’re interested – it’s rather easy.

      1. Yes, I have found that true myself but I think my use of it is improving my writing. How about you?

      2. If you don’t have it, try The Emotion Thesaurus by Ackerman – good reference for improving deep POV. I’m still fumbling with it all myself but at least I see where the problems are regarding show/tell.

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