Halloween can be a tough time of year. After all, you have to go out at night when all the monsters really get out. You could run into nearly anything at this time of year – and it gets dark early! Want to go for that evening run? You better be prepared for anything from the menacing neighborhood dog to – gulp – a werewolf. Here are some thoughts on how to survive an encounter with a werewolf and maybe even make a friend.
1. Be prepared for this possible encounter in several ways. First, remember that a wolf wants to chase something so don’t run – and certainly don’t scream since both reactions will just get this monster’s prey instinct going.
2. The next way to be prepared is to go out with some dog treats. This is a great way to make friends with a menacing dog – right? Just think of a werewolf as merely a troublesome dog – just one that needs a bit of special handling.
3. Remember, a werewolf is a person too – just confused by the sudden change into a dog. Wouldn’t you be? So do what you should with a dog and calmly take charge of the situation. Toss some treats to the werewolf while using some reassuring words in a calm, firm voice all in an effort to gain its trust.
4. Really take control by getting some training done without hesitation. Think you can’t? Many dogs will learn to sit rather quickly and this is a person inside a wolf’s body so they should pick up commands rather quickly. To do sit, show the treat and then, while saying, “sit”, move the treat over the werewolf’s head. I know these are big but they slouch and much like a dog, they should sit when interested in the treat. Remember to give the treat palm up.
5. You really don’t want to get bit by a werewolf because, well, you don’t want to be one. To discourage mouthing and snapping like a dog teach this monster the “leave it” command. This means pulling back you hand and saying the words, “Leave it.” This should work since you’ve already gained a certain amount of trust.
Just an aside here, but you can try escaping anyway but you may need some help!
6. Need to get this big beast under further control? Teach it the “down” command. From a sitting position and a treat in your hand, say, “Down,” as you lower your hand between its forepaws. The werewolf will be so interested in the treat it will go down. Repeat a few times to re-enforce these commands (get the werewolf up by using the word and raising a treat over it’s head).
7. If you think this might become a monthly issue make sure to keep a big chew-bone handy for full moons.
8. Also, if you find that you werewolf wants to jump up on you – and many dogs do – simply turn away without saying a word so that it learns it will get no attention whatsoever from you. It will learn that the behavior isn’t acceptable.
9. If this is a recurring issue and you find that said werewolf is having a tough time with good behavior, try to talk about what’s really going on with a dog behaviorist. Seriously, these trainers can do a lot of dogs, why not werewolves?
10. Last thought, if the werewolf sleeps on your porch or in your garage take care how you treat the person in the morning. Leave them a change of clothes nearby so they can get dressed and offer them a good breakfast. After all, they’ve been a wolf all night and that can be a little disconcerting as well as embarrassing. Oh, and don’t offer them food like it’s a treat and certainly don’t use commands on them – that’s just awkward.
At this point, you’ve hopefully made a friend out of both wolf and human. After all, dogs are man’s best friend, why can’t werewolves be included too?
P. H. Solomon lives in the greater Birmingham, AL area where he strongly dislikes yard work and sanding the deck rail. However, he performs these duties to maintain a nice home for his loved ones as well as the family’s German Shepherds. In his spare time, P. H. rides herd as a Computer Whisperer on large computers called servers (harmonica not required). Additionally, he enjoys reading, running, most sports and fantasy football. Having a degree in Anthropology, he also has a wide array of more “serious” interests in addition to working regularly to hone his writing. The Bow of Destiny is his first novel-length title with more soon to come.